Instant, involuntary, all-consuming hilarity.
A yell-laugh that surprises and sometimes scares people.
This is my mother.
Things that might make someone else smile or maybe even chuckle quietly, send my mom into giant fits of cackling that she is incapable of stopping. Her laughter starts unexpectedly and usually continues for three times as long as is necessary. When she realizes she's been laughing too long, it embarrasses her and causes her to laugh even harder! Once I received a voicemail from her with no words, only laughing. It was four minutes long.
My mother's laughter was the bane of my existence for many years of my childhood. No matter where we went, from movie theaters to supermarkets, my mom would find something funny and yell-laugh for ten minutes. As her extremely shy and unassuming daughter, I often found myself mortified.
My mother's laughter was the bane of my existence for many years of my childhood. No matter where we went, from movie theaters to supermarkets, my mom would find something funny and yell-laugh for ten minutes. As her extremely shy and unassuming daughter, I often found myself mortified.
Within the last month, Zach and I have had two visits. One from our friends Jurgen, Cory, and Brett and the other from my brother Evan. Both times I found myself in public places with them when something funny was said and I laughed my mother's laugh! This giant boisterous laugh spewed out of me while everyone around me looked startled. This made me laugh even harder, which made me think of my mom when she laughs, and all was lost at that point. In the end, I found myself in happy tears over something not even that funny. What has my mother done to me?!
That episode was like a chugging a giant glass of perspective. Sometimes the most embarrassing things about our parents or ourselves, turn out to be the things we love the most. I called my mom today to apologize for ever being embarrassed of her beautiful laughter.
This morning Zach and I went to a coffee shop to read, write, and think. I read a passage from "The Prophet" by: Kahlil Gibran.
"All things move within your being in constant half embrace,
the desired and the dreaded,
the repugnant and the cherished,
the pursued and that which you would escape.
These things move within you
as lights and shadows
in pairs that cling.
And when the shadow fades and is no more,
the light that lingers becomes shadow to another light."
That thing which I used to find so offensive, I now cherish. How amazing that understandings constantly evolve. All my thoughts and feelings, all my truth, are castles made of sand. Time swirls the ocean up around my walls and they crumble, change, become one with the beach.
I hope I never take myself too seriously.
No comments:
Post a Comment